Providing Support during Times of Conflict and Change 

The key questions in couples therapy are:

“Are people able to see their partner as a separate individual with their own internal world?”

“How do people cope when their partner is different from themselves or from how they would like them to be? Can they tolerate whatever they experience regarding the differences?”

Unlike behavioural, emotional or systemic methods, NARM focuses on internal conflicts, identifications and relational dynamics.

Strategies, self-concepts and interpersonal expectations derived from the adaptation to the “core conflict”, as well as the adaptation to and internalisation of deficits in the environment regarding developmental needs, are understood as internal obstacles to personal development.

In the case of existing relational conflicts, largely regardless of their specific content, acting-in and acting-out behaviours are understood as ways to avoid vulnerability and helplessness. This enables a preferred self-image, characterised by a fundamental distortion of identity, to be preserved.

The (“coping”) strategies that interfere with a constructive dialogue and authentic connection include, among others:

• criticism, blame and accusations

• avoidance and justification

• contempt and lack of respect

• putting up walls and withdrawal

These strategies lead to a loss of connection, understanding, empathy and agency when relating with others and to oneself.

The training is designed to enable participants to recognise and understand the underlying relational dynamics from a NARM perspective. Furthermore, participants will learn to identify the transference and countertransference processes that occur in couples therapy, and how these processes can be used to support developmental processes towards increased individuation and autonomy – essential prerequisites for connecting more authentically and intimately.

Using the well-established collaborative teaching and learning format, we will explore: “What internal obstacles do I encounter within myself and in my interactions with clients while working with couple dynamics?”

We will discuss supervision questions, deconstruct demonstration sessions and, in a collaborative manner, practise and deepen our understanding of the various “NARM-based” interventions.

Topics include:

• Relational spaces as places of longing associated with high expectations

  • Loneliness and being alone

  • Autonomy and intimacy

• Therapeutic approach – challenges and pitfalls when working with couples:

  • Openness and impartiality

  • Process orientation in the here-and-now

  • Efforting, resonance and countertransference stress

  • Triangulation dynamics

• The clinical model in couple therapy

  • “4 Pillars“

  • The process of emotional completion

  • Core conflict, survival styles and identity

  • Self-organisation and agency

• Containing to support “fine-tuning” and “meaning-making”: the therapist’s internal experience as a central therapeutic tool

• Indications and limitations of NARM working with couples and relational dynamics

  • “Conflict” vs. “Structure”

  • Capacity to keep agreements & boundaries

  • Couples therapy and/or individual therapy with strong acting-out or acting-in behaviours

Target group and prerequisites for participation

Certified NARM Therapists

Dates

February 25 – February 28, 2027

Location

De Poort, Groesbeek

Costs

Training fee (mandatory): € 845
Arrangement fee (mandatory):

Accommodation (overnight stay)

Single room with private bathroom: €538.99

Single room with shared bathroom: €497.74

Includes overnight stay(s), breakfast, lunch, dinner, and facilities.

Day arrangements (no overnight stay)

09:00 – 22:00 (lunch & dinner included): €317.25

09:00 – 17:00 (lunch included, no dinner): €220.80

It is not possible to attend without booking one of these options.

Register